Random Thoughts

I'm feeling kind of melancholy today. I'm thinking about the fact that I am leaving my family for three weeks and it's really hard to not worry that things will run smoothly without me. Maybe I give myself too much credit. Ok, I probably do. I am heading to Missouri to be with my #2 daughter, Brittany and her husband for the birth of their baby. I'm leaving the younger three home with my hubby for the first two weeks and #1 daughter, Lindsay for the last week when hubby will join me. I am the one who wakes them up in the morning, fixes them breakfast, makes sure that they get ready on time and drives them to school. I know that it is good for them to have to do things for themselves but let's face it, they are my babies (even though they are 16, 13 & 13). Part of it is me being a little controlling (yes, just a little). I like to have a schedule and routine and I won't be here to make sure it goes smoothly. Kelly leaves for work at 4:30 am so they will be on their own to get up, have breakfast and get themselves to school. I know that kids all over America do this every morning and survive, but they aren't my kids!
I'm also thinking about being away from Kelly for two weeks. We have been apart for longer, a lot longer (1 yr+ deployment to Afghanistan) but it is always him leaving, not me. I'm also thinking about him leaving for Iraq in a couple months and this two weeks is that much less time we have to spend together.
Finally, I am thinking about Brittany having a baby, my baby, having a baby! It is so wierd to realize that in a very short time that I will be a grandmother. How is that even possible? I'm also sad that they live so far away and I will only be able to see him occasionally until Nick gets done with the Army. And, Kelly will miss so much, the baby will be about 18 months old when he gets back from Iraq. Stupid military! Sorry to be such a downer, then next one will be better, I promise!