Saturday, September 5, 2009

Birthday

Well, today is my 45th birthday. Wow, that seems so crazy to think that I am halfway through my 40s! To be honest though, I feel better physically and mentally and better about myself in general than I did in my 20s or 30s. Sometimes I feel so mad at myself for "wasting" those years feeling depressed and down on myself but I have to remind myself that those years brought me here to where I am today and that's a pretty darn good place. I do wish I could go back and tell my younger self to take better care of myself. To eat better, to exercise, to work out the issues that kept me feeling down on myself, but I choose to look forward not backward. I'm thankful for this time of life. I'm eating better, trying to exercise regularly, feeling better about my body, enjoying having the freedom that "almost" grown-up kids bring. I'm happier than ever with my relationship with my husband. We are kind of "rediscovering" each other after years of raising kids. I think that these long separations have made us appreciate each other more. I know that it has for me. I want to enjoy every minute that we have to spend together. I want to do so many things right now. I want to take some more art classes and discover just what I am best at. Taking art last year really awakened the creative side of me that had been kind of pushed down for so many years. I also want to learn to kayak and scuba dive and travel. I just want to appreciate all the important things in life that aren't things: family, love, time, etc. I feel like maybe this is like the half-way point in my life and I want to make the second half the best it can be! Happy Birthday to me!!

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